Who I Work With
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Non-Monogamous and Polyamorous
What Non-Monogamous/Polyamorous Therapy is like with me:
Having worked with a fair number of individuals identifying this way, I'm starting to hear a common theme, along the lines of, "We've worked with some therapists who don't get it, it's nice to work with someone who does."
Perhaps you're fairly comfortable with your practice of non-monogamy and are looking for help with one particular relationship. Perhaps you are just starting to figure out the nuts and bolts of non-monogamy and are looking for help with how this lifestyle/philosophy does or doesn't fit with you. Maybe you'd like to be able to work with all of your partners in the same room as opposed to one at a time. No matter where you fall in your journey, I am thrilled to start working with you.
It disappoints me that as a field, many clinicians are still grappling with how to show support and work effectively with this population. My systemic training and professional experiences have prepared me to provide the highest standard of care for you, no matter where you fit under the non-monogamous umbrella.
What Couples Therapy is like with me:
Clients have shared that they find me to be calm, cool, and collected and commented that my demeanor is helpful in creating a space to explore difficult things. I don't see myself as an expert in the room, but more as a qualified consultant who can help navigate the very real difficulties of relationships. You know your relationship best, and it is in this vein that I explore the relevant issues you want to discuss and the goals you want to accomplish.
Our goals in treatment are really driven by you and what you wish to accomplish. My goal is to instill the skills and awareness it takes to confidently and safely advocate for your needs in relationship. When you feel better able to be vulnerable with your partner about your deepest needs, you'll know we are on the right track.
I work from an approach called Emotionally Focused Therapy. It is the most empirically validated approach with couples in the field right now, showing long-term and stable results. This approach is also most consistent with my strengths as a therapist. Emotionally Focused Therapy is well suited for couples however you identify and whatever background you come from. It utilizes emotion, as well as other types of expression like cognition and behavior, to look at cycles of conflict and what drives them.
What Individual Therapy is like with me:
One of the things I really value about individual therapy is the depths we can go in a simple, straight-forward conversation.
I utilize Emotionally Focused Individual Therapy (EFIT) which is an exciting and newer approach born from Emotionally Focused Therapy for couples. Don't let the name fool you; EFIT encompasses all of the ways you experience the world and helps explore your internal patterns and underlying needs like many of the best approaches.
My practice with individuals is also informed by existential philosophers and psychotherapists as well as mindfulness practices when appropriate. I utilize existential interventions because allowing ourselves to acknowledge the impermanence of life can be a motivating factor unlike any other. Mindfulness is particularly well suited for building increased sensitivity to our moment-to-moment experiences and the strategies we use to handle difficult emotions. As we work, you will construct an internal framework that leads to a more meaningful and full experience of self.